Higher Than An Eagle
Posted: Wednesday, January 30, 2008
by Judi Lake
Judi Lake Advertising
“She’s a fighter, she’ll find the strength to pull through
this," said one.
Another replied, “I don’t think so; not this time… she’s
tired… really tired."
And still another added, “I agree. This time she’s ready to
let go."
Silence. Dead air. Long lull.
There was nothing more to say.
****
I turned on the television and, at first, didn’t know what
to make of what was being shown, Slowly, I grasped the horror: A plane had hit
one of the WTC’s towers. Grabbing the phone, I immediately called my
girlfriend’s husband, John.
“John, how’s Kathy? Have you heard anything?"
“Yes, Judi, Kath called on her cell phone and, thank God,
she’s alright. Everyone from Kemper evacuated safely."
Two weeks after escaping the World Trade Center attack,
Kathy was diagnosed with breast cancer and underwent a radical mastectomy.
Following months of grueling chemotherapy, she was told that the cancer had
spread and the diagnosis was not good.
“I want to live, Judi – I am not ready to leave this world
yet!"
Unable to control my emotions, I cried for my friend. Next
to my mother, Kathy is the strongest person I have known. Similar to my mom,
Kathy’s strength has always been manifested from her deep devotion to God.
Burdened within this fierce battle, she’s remained
determined and grateful. Her spirit has continued to be faithful as her body
and immune system has slowly deteriated. Seven years after her first diagnosis,
cancer has touched every part of her body.
“Thank God for my beautiful wigs," she’d often joke. In the
midst of her numerous doctor appointments and hospitalizations, somehow she has
continued with her career as a company executive and often flies to DC as a
spokesperson for The American Cancer Society.
“People need hope and as long as I am alive, I feel
compelled to help other woman realize that cancer is not a death sentence."
****
In
the midst of an important deadline, the phone rings with a frantic client on
the other end.
“Judi,
is it too late to make changes?"
“No,
David, we haven’t gone to press yet – you’re safe until Friday."
With
a sigh of relief, my client promises to send his copy changes via e-mail in
thirty minutes.
Impatiently
I begin to sort through my e-mails and am immediately struck by the following:
From:
Kathy & John
Date:
2008/01/30 Mon AM 01:51:53 CST
To:
Judi Lake
Subject:
JUDI/JOHN
Kathy
is not doing so well. She slipped into a coma last night and I don't think she
will be with me too much longer. All we can do is try to keep her comfortable
and wait. I have accepted it because she is going to a better place. It still
hurts though. It hurts real bad. She has made me a better man and father; I am
so mush better now than I ever was.
Love John
& Kathy
As I re-read the e-mail, my hands tremble and I begin to sob
deeply… very deeply. I cancel my remaining appointments for the day and sit
quietly in thought and prayer. I long to caress her in her final moments but am
separated by the distance of thousands of miles and caring for a sick child.
I pray for her final moments. I pray for her family and
friends. I pray that Jesus hugs “his baby girl" tightly with thousands of
butterfly kisses because she has been an extraordinary testimony for Him. I
pray that I can be a positive support system for her husband who has cared for
his dying wife faithfully and lovingly.
My thoughts are interrupted by yet another phone call. I
answer quietly and hang up in a “zombie like state."
It is finished. Kathy went home one hour ago. She is finally
at peace. She is finally healthy. And I believe she is safely and lovingly in
the arms of her Jesus.
As I pen this, I think of the many times that Kathy had
described me as being a remarkable woman. I am not; she was. For all the
“glories" in my life it was Kathy who had always triumphed yet was humbly
satisfied to go unnoticed; I, on the other hand, followed the spotlight.
Somberly, I think of the lyrics to the song, The Wind Beneath My
Wings by Sonata Arctica:
“…So
I was the one with all the glory,
while
you were the one with all the strength.
A
beautiful face without a name for so long.
A
beautiful smile to hide the pain…
…Did
I ever tell you you're my hero?
You're
everything, everything I wish I could be.
Oh,
and I, I could fly higher than an eagle,
for
you are the wind beneath my wings,
'cause
you are the wind beneath my wings…"
God speed, dear Kathy, I will miss you but I am confident
that the Heavens are rejoicing in your welcome. Good-bye for now, my friend.
Okay Judi, the tears are flowing -both with Joy for Kathy, that she is in the arms of Jesus, and sorrow, for those that are left behind. I am praying for her husband and for all who loved her dearly! I love you! TeresaTeresa, intellectually, we understand this but our humanness still mourns. Our joy is in that she is no longer suffering and is enjoying her rewards in Paradise. Thanks for your thoughts and prayers.
Judi another great job from a really good and decent, caring person. Your writing touches many and your heart is filled with love. I think your friend has met mine up there and they are both talking about all of us and how happy they will be when we finally leave this Valley of Tears behind to join them. After all we all have a different ticket but it is gaurenteed passage. With deepest sorrow over your loss and best wishes for you and yours RTM.Yes, Robert, I too believe that our loved ones are celebrating in Paradise and happy to leave, as you say, "this valley of tears." But, within our humanity, is our selfishness of missing our loved ones. Thanks for commenting.
Judi, a touching article to your friend. I'm sorry you are going through this.Thanks, LM -- it was expected but not expected if that makes sense.
It is so difficult to lose someone close to you. I'm sorry for your loss but know that she is in a better place.Barbara, yes, the loss is sad but I do rejoice that Kathy is healthy and in Paradise now. Thanks for your kind comments.
Judi, I am very sorry about the loss of your friend. Be well.Thank you, James -- your well wishes deeply appreciated.
A lovely tribute Judi. She is our loss but heaven's gain. My deepest sympathies. *warm hug*Very well put, Avis, thank you and a warm tight hug back to you! Thanks!
